mos.rule.

the rule.

her singular rule for me is no contact. nada whatsoever. no sms, no calls, no emails, no accidental meetings, nothing. its a no win situation. even if i keep to the pact it would only be because i am consiously thinking about it. then i thought i saw her that day just before my meeting at singapore land tower.

i ducked.

it wasn't her. but all the same everything floods back. it took a while before i recovered, reeling at the entrance of the overtly hygenically stale SL. tower. i swallowed, swallowing always helps, and then went up to see william.

fast game, yada yada yada yada. quote this do that. fine fine.

i kept thinking about her the whole day. not that it wasn't a norm, but it was definitely more than usual. i am surprised at myself, by all my past statistics, i should have been over this by now, met someone new, and probably, ended that one by now. again. there has to be a reason/s behind these nagging feelings for her.

which is it?

her personality - silently headstrong. she looks and talks so demurely that one forgets that once B makes up her mind, it's a shit jog to hell to make her change it. have always been attracted to the headstrong-too-independent-for-their-own-good type. i.e. princess and joys.

her looks - ordinary at best, of course, she does have her wow days, but even without those, she's an angel to me. esp when she looks at you with that half smile, the shy head down with the soft giggle.

the way she speaks - soft. that giggle. the way she insists.

the exception - every once in a while, i fall for someone and keep falling for that someone regardless. so far the count is 3. including B.

the verdict? all this thinking only got me realising one thing;

i miss her.

****

listeningto: river - joni mitchell (hear the jingle bell tune made hip)

tryingtoread: justine - lawrence durrell (am a sucker for flowery descriptives.)

best line i heard today: " lets sit these kids in a r-rated movie " - homer simpson