someone needs sex.

i made myself some triple layer ham sandwich just now because i'm mildly depressed and sandwiches are comforting, esp. when its gormet ham with odd names like walnut ham, pacific chicken ham, and something something sandwich ham. then to blanket the comfort, meiji plastic canister type milk.

fine, i failed at writing something which was meant to exorcise something and its pissing me off. so there, bourgeois depression. so urban nothing.

my house-hunting intentions has flared up again.

dry.

i am dry. dry i tell u.

insomniac2.

it's 3 freaking am.

i have a meeting at 9am. which means i have to be in at 7ish to clear a ton of work waiting for me at the office. (becoz i wasted my leave on thurs and fri, doing jack.)

i can't sleep. nabey. x100000000000000.

gonna see if reading lawrence durrell helps.

***
listeningto: SPEED! - my graduation! (hahahaa. omg. i turned into a schoolgirl.)
reading: reflections on a marine venus - lawrence durrell.

nabey, i am older than the pc.

trivia - the ibm 5150 pc, the original personal computer was launched on 12 aug 1981 which makes me nabey older than the freaking pc. so undignifying. :(

another - on one of my net-surfing/lurking trip, i reencountered one of my fav poems;

I never saw a wild thing sorry for itself.
A small bird will drop frozen dead from a bough
Without ever having felt sorry for itself.

-- D.H. Lawrence

cool huh?

went to the library lelong sale yesterday, ended up buying a pack of harper's magazine, which is actually an interesting read. bought other odd books, fitzgerald, etc and prospero's cell by lawrence durrell, which i already own, but my heart broke to see durrell's beautiful book tossed around by peasants who cannot recognise a gem for what it is. so i bought it for 2 bucks, so sad. lawrence durrell banished to the bargain bin.

total damage - 21$, 5 for the mags, 2 for each of the books = 8 books (some i know i won't even touch, why?).

listeningto: chanchan - buena vista social club
reading: after the fires - boey kim cheng

ego at guardian.

was having my 1st try at fun with guardian's poetry workshop. haha. it's also the first review i've got from writing stuff eh, for some time now. and it turned out pretty well, so i'm having a big ego moment, even though it's just another poetry workshop and i shouldnt. haha.

here it is - guardian.

hmmm, not too pleased that my line spacings were altered though. eh, however, i suspect thats due to apple mail translating to outlook rather than anything else. alamak, ah f-* it la. :)

***

listening to: every mother's son - the pretenders
reading: marrying off mother and other stories - gerald durrell

anniversary.

major insomnia yesterday/this morning. finally managed to knock out at 4, which meant i woke at 1.30, blur like sotong. i thought this insomnia thing was over and done with. oh well, think i caught it from the girl who doesnt sleep (come to think of it, that she has that name, makes it poetic irony).

oh, this is an anniversary, so i've been doing this blog thing for an entire year. odd feeling annivesaries, like it's some kind of achievement, when all it proves is that something was kept up for x period of time. whether you like it or not.

went to the yishun dam yesterday. arggh the place is being ruined. there are so many initial d-wannabes there with their souped up vehicles and their obligatory lians. (not complaining about that though) though the ice-cream men there do get major business.

it amazes me that people are so bored that they'll up and go all the way to yishun dam and just hang out in large band by the side of the road, doing jack. i dun get it but i was there too, so guilty of the same.

it's a weird place. there's nothing there, but the drive there and the wide expanse of water is cool, if there are no crowd.


listeningto: touched by the sun - carly simon
reading: anxiety of influence - harold bloom